You’ll change your mind 100 times – It’s okay.

For anyone that may have read the “About Me” section on here, you may have read that I wanted to be the next Spencer Reid or a Behavioral Analyst for the FBI. As for my close family and friends, you know that for the past several months I’ve been weighing the Pro’s and Con’s of going into that. You also know that I’ve wanted to be a Veterinarian, a Forensic Pathologist, a NICU Nurse, a Physician Assistant, and most recently a BAU Agent…..well I hate to tell you again, but I’m not going to do any of those and I’ll tell you why.

I’ve changed my mind over the course of the past 3 to 4 years on what I wanted to do once I graduate from College, and it’s due to the fact of mostly, how much loans and years it would take to be my past career ideas; becoming a Vet – too expensive, becoming a Forensic Pathologist – I would be in my late 30’s or early 40’s before I finished and I want a family before my eggs become too old. I had thought about a NICU Nurse, but I didn’t pass my College Algebra class with a high enough grade for my University. I also considered a BAU Agent, but I’ve done my research and it was going to be at least a year at Quantico and then 10 years in the field minimum. That was all supposed to happen before I could even apply to the BAU and even then I would be competing against tons of other qualified and talented agents. I wasn’t sure I wanted to be a field agent for 10 or more years before I even got a chance into the BAU.

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So the past several months I have been researching other routes such as School Counseling and School Psychology, which I found rather interesting due to the fact that every time I consider my future career, it has something to do with children. I’ve thought about Foster Care Agency, Adoption Agencies, and anything that has to do with Social Services for children, but none of them were some place I could see myself in. I met with a family friend to discuss what a School Counselor does over the summer, and got some School Counselors information that was in the School District I live in. Before I knew it, I was researching more into how to be a School Counselor, finding resources, starting a Pinterest board and contacting local schools in my district to possibly shadow one of the Counselors. That’s when my mom suggested shadowing at my old elementary school, which was even more exciting (aside from the bad experiences there in the past).

The first time I met with the lady I am currently shadowing, I felt as though we clicked right away and I was able to be open about things with her, probably because she is a School Counselor that listens, helps, gives advice and anything else that the children may need from her, which shows how amazing of Counselor she is. Last week was my first day shadowing her, and I was so excited to see what would be going on during my time there. Thankfully when I got there, she was still finishing her lunch and gave me a bit of review of her day before we got into only a small portion of what she does during an average day. It wasn’t until we went to a classroom to teach a lesson, that I really felt like I could picture myself doing something as remarkable and satisfying as that.

It was wonderful how she was able to connect with the kids right away, and how they knew when she came into the room what was going to happen in the next 30 minutes. They idolized and respected her, just as they did any of their other teachers and I hadn’t ever seen a classroom full of kids open themselves up and trust her before. So many of the experiences I remember as a kid, I felt like I couldn’t trust any teacher until I met my favorite teacher that is. It was beautiful that these kids could sense that she was a friendly, respecting and honorable adult that they could put their full trust in. Someone they can go to if someone is threatening them, hurting them, or just feel like they are struggling with life at that moment. That was the moment that I knew I could see myself in her position at an Elementary school in the future and have that much respect and to be admired by the children, just as she is by them.

If I had known there was someone when I was in Elementary school to talk to, I would have taken them up on that offer. To be able to provide that to an Elementary student whether it’s testing taking skills, friendship problems, grades aren’t doing well, bullying or anything that they feel a School Counselor could do to help them…..that is the best job in my eyes, to be that support and the one adult that they can trust.

That was only one day’s worth of shadowing her to, through the next couple months I have the opportunity to help her with lessons, learn how to handle certain situations,  learn what she uses to keep track and organized – because come on, who doesn’t like some organization? – and absorb as much I can to be the best School Counselor I can be for the future children that I may make an impact on.

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I always felt like I was meant to do something with children, and kept wondering for most of my College years exactly how I would make an impact on children….it just took until my Senior Year to figure it out. Better late then never, I guess.

From the Ashes,

The Rising Phoenix

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